Master Anecdotes 1960s - part one
Morgan, Sharp, Bull, Chumbley, Groves, Armes, Broderick, Backhouse, Hargreaves, Harris, Tarrant, Woodhurst, Lister, Evans, Hill, Slade, Barker, Heaton, Saxby, Maddocks, Springall, Sanders, Turner, Baxter, Dines, Wilkes, Lovatt, N. Brown, Saxby, Challis,

E.J.W. MORGAN (1960-1977)
Subject: Chemistry
Nickname: 'Jet'

How did Jet Morgan come by his nickname - there was a rumour of an RAF connection - any truth in this? (Pete Isaac)

When he came to RLS (about 59/60?) it was only a few years after that wonderful programme on the wireless called 'Journey into Space' had finished, so the name Morgan immediately reminded us of the famous captain of the spacecraft. As I recall there was also Doc, Mitch and Lemmy. Actually, I think Jet Morgan in the series was played by Andrew Faulds who later became a Labour MP. Getting back to Jet the teacher, does anyone remember that he used to 'smoke' his chalk? He was obviously a 40 a day man and found it difficult to get through a lesson without having an imaginary fag in his hand. (Derek Humphrey)

His most endearing habit was the way he pronounced the names of the common gasse: "OxyGIN, HydroGIN and NitroGIN." A Freudian slip perhaps? He was also a very good tennis player. (Andy Lee)

a man for whom fresh air held untold fears as testified to by anyone who witnessed the desperate way in which he lovingly caressed a whole piece of chalk, holding it between the first two fingers of his right hand and absent mindedly lifted it to his lips before he realised that it didn't hold the nicotine 'hit' that he so desperately craved an afternoon of triple chemistry terrified the life out of me that's because i'm an artsy fartsy, laid back, chilled out kind of guy.....ok yah?
but for jet it was like an intellectual challenge as to how he could possibly find excuses to get out of the lab enough times to feed his habit and yes, i do believe he was an excellent tennis player but he must have been sponsored by virginia slims!! (Graham Lee)

'Jet' Morgan, Chemistry, who once dropped an entire jar of sodium into a bowl of water and was out the door faster than a rat up a drainpipe (not the first time he'd blown up the chemistry lab, it seems). (Colin Newlyn)

...an occasion, not rare amongst chemistry teachers I guess, when Mr Morgan set up an elaborate experiment on the front bench to demonstrate some no doubt very important, but very volatile, chemical principle to a bunch of disinterested 3rd-formers.
Great care was taken to ensure the safety of the observers, including a cage and a screen to protect the awed students from the expected violence of the reaction. Light the blue touch-paper and stand back!
Any moment now! Ten seconds at most!.
Twenty seconds ... thirty seconds ... one minute later - no reaction!
You've guessed it - our leader approached the failing experiment with great trepidation to investigate the chemical inactivity. Just as he got within range ... BANG! (Andy Lee)

Andy wrote: He seemed permanently to shuffle around, and I was amazed that he could possibly be such a keen tennis player. Perhaps the 10 year difference between us made the difference? Actually, what I meant to express was my surprise (at the time) that the moment he changed into his tennis kit, he seemed to transform completely from a slightly decrepit shuffler into a much smarter and more sprightly sportsman. (John Phillips)

Jet Morgan, who was definitely my favourite 6th form teacher, taught us inorganic Chemistry and managed to make it both simple and reasonably interesting. Especially timing from the start of the lesson to see how many minutes it would be before he dived into the back room and lit up! Occasionally Jet would dispense with all pretence at subtlety and simply light up a No. 10 in front of us while he was teaching, which as you can imagine could be a special kind of torture for sixth-formers who had to wait until they were safely on the bus home before daring to produce their fags. (John Bailey)

More like an eighty to a hundred a day man! My most vivid memory of him; is of his gliding gait [maybe he had haemorrhoids] and with a cigarette dangling from his mouth. I used to smoke sixty a day but have reduced it to twenty; I would smoke sixty if my health would allow it! (Rhod Hood) Maxi Jake recalled - "Inorganic Chemistry, with 'Jet' Morgan, was awful". Indeed it was mate, the worst class of every week. And those weird pronunciations Jet had e.g. aitch too aysss = H2S. Also remember him calling to Flossie - Missis Kaaayslayke. Man was a good few sandwiches short of a picnic I reckoned. But at least we had Flossie and the leggy Ms Dines to ogle, the only thing that made sitting in that bloody awful lab bearable, well apart from shoving compass point up through the hole in the stools into another boys arse - I recall doing Michelle le Singe quite nicely once, and Pferd I think. Anyone else recall the ritual compass-up-arse routine? Was it only our year? (Stephen Byrne)

'Jet' Morgan used to demonstrate the volatility of certain elements when exposed to the atmosphere. He would take a jar of said element (immersed in a suitable inert liquid) and with a knife cut a bit of one of the pieces and flick it into a bowl of water. it would then fizz, pop, smoke or whatever. I can't remember all the elements, but there were 3 I think, the last being the most volatile - sodium? Anyway, whilst cutting the bit off, 'Jet' managed to drop the WHOLE PIECE into the water. The pyrotechnics were much greater than expected, and we all heard him shout 'Get out - NOW' as he sped through the open door. Those of us at the back of the class rushed to the rear door - to find it was LOCKED! We all managed to get out through the front door (by running past the exploding water bowl) and stood outside as smoke billowed from the lab and a large crowd of amused school boys gathered to watch. It was the only time we enjoyed studying the periodic table. I do recall a couple of classic Jet -isms. 'You, boy, sit down and get out' and 'Vango, what's your name, boy?' (Colin Newlyn)

Jet Morgan: The apparatus for some complex experiment had been set up on the front bench in the (large, Junior) Chemistry Lab. There were tripods, clamps, pipes, corks, tubes, airlocks, etc., etc., a large beaker containing some mysterious fluid with gas bubbling through it, plus the ubiquitous Bunsen burner carefully aligned beneath the beaker. It must have had danger potential because, on this occasion, a safety screen - presumably of some kind of toughened glass - had been erected along the front edge of the bench, clearly to protect the pupils from any possible mishap. "Observe that, when heat is applied, ... [whatever it was that we were supposed to observe] ..." commanded Jet, lighting the Bunsen burner and stepping back gingerly to the safety of the pupils' side of the screen. We observed ... and observed ... but there was nothing to observe. Nothing happened. For several minutes, it seemed, nothing happened in abundance. Clearly the experiment had been set up incorrectly, Jet concluded - too low a gas pressure perhaps, or possibly the mysterious fluid was at the wrong dilution. He approached the bench in order to terminate the miserable failure and - you've guessed it - !!BANG!!. Bits of broken beaker, pipe, cork and so on flew through the air, but the safety screen did it's job and pupils and master remained unhurt. Cheers and howls of laughter from the pupils and an embarrassed Chemistry Master. (Andy)

Other Jet-isms: "Glover, you're walking like a Nancy Boy!" "If I hit you I shall probably kill you!" (Steve) Yes, Yes! and said in a death-rattle voice with a slight welsh accent. The humour of the second one is that had he tried to hit anyone he would probably have killed himself with the effort. He appeared to be half-dead already, and given his substantial nicotine habit he's probably completed the task by now. He was never nasty though, and could be quite kindly, as I recall. (Colin Newlyn)

Yes, Colin Newlyn, we let a chosen few of you young 'uns in to play three-card brag and lose your bus fares! Jet was no harm to anyone, you're right. He must have been an inspired teacher as well, as I passed my chemistry "O" level understanding nothing except organic chemistry - all permutations of various alcohols, as I recall. Never did understand those mole things. (Steve Snelgrove)

Does anyone remember Jet's less visually appealing assistant, Mrs. Moxley, during the seventies? Had a face that could turn you to stone at fifty paces and an equally sunny character as Jet himself. (Ian Puxley)

Peter Robinson wrote: "Mrs M Keslake it tells me - Marion, I think. Laboratory assistant to Jet Morgan. Commenced 1964/5?, and I think was still there when I departed '68."
Or as Jet used to pronounce it: Mrs Kayyyzlake. she must have left before1970 because we had a different assistant when I was failing A-level chemistry. Was it Mrs Dines? Not sure. ( Steve East)

"...remember the case of Jet Morgan's Fast Emptying Wallet?" As the Hon Ash has been saying it all comes flooding back but sadly not about a wallet. What does come back is the strange ritual we had in our Chemistry class of miraculously revealing a lump of coal somewhere in the room during the lesson, every week without fail there would be the lump of coal. Sometime he would have a pile of it on his desk. Why we did it I don't know. Then to cap it all we would rig up a delayed fountain at the end of the lesson, line from tap to test tube which would fill up giving time delay then on to the Bunson both being hidden in the bench drawer, water through a Bunson hits the ceiling with no trouble and if you get three or four going just before the bell it was like the new fountains in Somerset House. (Greg Cooper)

I don't know if we were in the same chemistry lesson when Jet tried to get somebody to pee into a test-tube so that he could show the test for diabetes. I think everybody was too embarrassed and I don't think anybody could be talked into it. (Chris Fribbins)

Sorry, not me, but were you in the class in our year - when Chlorine escaped and the entire class started coughing up nasty things as they spilled out into the quad? (Greg Cooper)

The Tale of 'Jet' Morgan's Wallet: Towards the end of one lesson, 'Jet' discovered that some money was missing from his wallet and 'Jake' was summoned. Of course 'Jake' attempted to persuade 'Jet' that he might have mislaid the money - NOT. We were all instantly labelled as potential thieves and n'er-do-wells and were informed that the missing money must be returned to the wallet, which was left on 'Jet's' desk while the pair went for a walk around the quad. Now I know not whether the original money had been filched or mislaid. But I do know that while the Two J's were out walking, another pupil who must (or maybe must not, time will tell) remain nameless took the remaining notes in the wallet, climbed out of a window, hid the money in High Trees, and then climbed back through the window. You can imagine the explosion which followed when 'Jake' returned. Pockets were turned out but, of course, no money (of the correct denomination) found. No one was going to grass on this particular tea leaf and a lengthy period of detentions and lines-writing ensued before 'Jake' eventually accepted that he was never going to unearth the culprit. The most difficult thing about the episode was not laughing when 'Jake' and 'Jet' returned to the room and seeing the look on 'Jet's' face when he discovered all his money had gone awol. (Chris Stratford)

Chris I remember there being a wallet incident, and the Jake bit - but legging it into High Trees and back? Are you sure this wasn't the same time as the noxious gas was circulating clouding the memory? Mind you it is probably worth speculating who could have been up to such a thing - Tom Saunders would not fit thru the window, what about Pat Willows - always up for a laugh, or Frank Etherington recently mentioned or Andy Cop before the gas got to him. Not the exploding Fisher or the Hon Ash, not me, not Hon Vince, not Hon Edmonds, not Hon Fribbens, not Hon DD, not you? so who? (Greg Cooper)

That has to have been one of the most appalling tales I have read on this list! Fancy standing by and watching whoever-it-was empty Jet's wallet, and then taking all those detentions etc. as a result. If anyone in my year had tried the same stunt in the same circumstances he would have been set upon by the rest of the class and prevailed upon not to make things worse than they already were. Jake and Jet must *really* have p*ss*d you guys off to make you do a thing like that! Funnily enough, if you went on and did Chemistry in the 6th form Jet became very avuncular and friendly - I think he felt far more at ease with older boys than he did with youngsters. (John Phillips)

I can remember smoking in his class. You could crawl in under the benches in the chemistry lab and light up. Jet was a chain smoker himself and he used to skive out in the middle of lessons for a smoke himself. So he couldn't smell the smoke in the lab. (Ian Macauley)

Jet Morgan and Bumbling George Jones were particularly guilty of calling us by the wrong names, and we did our best to add to their confusion. We would always correct them when they got the names wrong - and on the occasions they did call me Stratford I would say "No, sir - Menzies", and vice versa (Steve and I certainly did share the same Oscar Wilde-sharp humour). (Chris Stratford)

A.W. SHARP (1961-1964/5)
Subject: Music
Nickname: 'Tony'

An extract from Tony's letter - [I'll happily forward any comments to him.] 'Thank you for the interesting note on The Royal Liberty website. Itlooks as if I made my mark there, without causing TOO much trouble. I must say I'd forgotten about the harpsichord kit, etc ... Not sure whether it wasa good idea. Bill Broderick, bless him, with his own admission, would not beable to tell the difference between a Ford and a Rolls Royce. I certainly did not play the kit in The Purcell Room recitals, but always a Tom Goffharpsichord. 1 was lucky in those days .... Stephen Jones says I wrote a Jazz Mass, performed by John Dankworth. It was a Rock Mass which I recordedin Morgan Studios, London, with my band and a few session singers (including members of The King's Singers). One can see how THE BIBLE was written ... All good fun. There'd be no harm in mentioning my book 'THE HOUSE OF BAGHDAD'- to be available in paper back soon (hopefully in September) via the internet - Amazon, etc, and published by 1st Books Library in America. I received a copy of the cover today with the ISBN and company logo. It looksgood, so I keep my fingers crossed for its success.' (from Tony Sharp via Andy Lee)

Andy Lee's kind offer to pass on comments to Tony Sharp prompts me toask that he convey to Tony my heartfelt thanks for awakening an interestin music that might otherwise have lain dormant. What pleasure I wouldhave missed! Looking back, it was Tony's enthusiasm and respect formusic of many types and ages that captured my imagination. And then,the excitement of taking part -- of being part of that glorious moment when, for example, the opening chorus of "Zadok the Priest" almost took the roof off the Hall. (Prof. Peter G. Underwood)

I well remember Tony Sharp and the (s)harpsichord, though left before it was finished, so never heard it played. Tony Sharp took me and a few others to my first opera: the wonderful Wendy Toye production of "Orpheus in the Underworld" at Sadlers Wells. At the end of Act I the entire cast went off to Hell in a tube train after hoisting a huge banner proclaiming "To Hell with Everyone". I think this laid the seeds of a lifelong love of opera and certainly demolished any prejudices I might have had about opera being stuffy or elitist. As other people have pointed out, Tony didn't try and convert us to the music he liked but got us to be critical about what we were listening to anyway. He allowed me virtually free access to both the piano and the organ in the school hall. I left RLS in 1963 when my father, previously posted to RAF Hornchurch, retired from the RAF. Around the time I left I seem to remember it being rumoured that Tony had eloped with one of the school secretaries. Does anyone else remember this? (Patrick Micel) Patrick - I think that your recollection may be referring to The Cad Chumbley (Maths) and the delightful Ellen Challis of the generous bosom. Hon. Member Maltby will remind us of the details, recorded previously in these columns. Tony Sharp (A Sharp - Music teacher! - a good 'un!) was, as I recall, last heard of playing jazz piano in a Spanish bar having decided to leave the UK and his creditors behind after a less than successful foray into musical production. (Andy Lee)

For me, the infectious enthusiasm of Tony Sharp for music confirmed a life-long (so far!) commitment to singing in a church choir.  I started when in the junior school at St Edward's -- the choice on a Sunday was Sunday School or the church choir.  The latter seemed to offer more fun (despite the need, also, to attend choir practice) and, as I was to discover, a useful supplement to pocket money in the form of a sixpence for singing at weddings; over the years this rose to the princely sum of half-a-crown.  I remember, with nostalgia, the school choir rendition of "Zadok, the priest" and our singing in assembly of "Jerusalem": both, in their way, were formative moments.  (Peter Underwood)

Another moment: the School Hall, a concert, with Tony Sharp as conductor. The popularity of Tony Sharp and his distinctive style as a music teacher had encouraged many of us to join the choir and I had just migrated from alto to the bass section. The opening piece was Handel's "Zadok the priest". The dramatic build-up by the orchestra began and then the choir burst in. It nearly took the roof off and my mother, a somewhat reluctant attendee, has never forgotten it. "A high tingle quotient" is how she puts it. For me it resulted in a devotion to choral music and the continued satisfaction of singing in a church choir. (Peter G. Underwood)

Is there any truth in the rumour that Tony Sharp 'accidentally' let an old upright piano plunge down the flight of stairs by the back of the hall? Was this to ensure it would no longer be playable and therefore make it necessary to buy a new piano for the school? Was Tony illustrating to pupils the fate of one of his distant relatives, A Flat Minor? I remember seeing the piano after it's sudden downfall and being surprised at the number of (previously) working parts now revealed through the broken case. (Steve Jones)

 

He allowed us to play 'pop' records of the day (1962/3) in some music lessons - we were expected to discuss their relative merits in a reasonably serious way. Steve's earlier note records that "After leaving RLS he forged a career as a concert harpsichordist ..." (Andy)

 

I do know that he gave some concerts on the (S) harpsichord as I went to one (or perhaps two) in London. He was a great chap, gifted with charm, lack of respect for the system, and musical talent. (Bill Broderick)

This message reminds me that Tony Sharp built a harpsichord in Tydeman's woodwork shop. He must have sent for a kit harpsichord, just add glue, like a large model aircraft kit.  It took up a large area at the back of the room for months whilst he was in the process of assembling it.  It was the size of ababy-grand piano, maybe a little smaller. Did anyone see this finished, or even hear Tony play it? (John Hawkins)

Yes, indeed. It found its way into the Hall at one stage - and Tony certainly played it. I've always thought that it was the one he played in the previously mentioned London Concerts - but to be honest I could not distinguish between a left hand drive harpsichord and a right hand drive model! (Bill Broderick)

Tony Sharp left in either 1964 or 1965, and was succeeded by Carl Browning, who was definitely in post in the Autumn term of '65 as he got me through Music 'O' level on a "fast track."  Tony Sharp used to love to test the school organ to its limits during assembly, and sometimes went too far for the electric bellows, leading to the magnificent tones expiring in a gasping wheeze, to everyone's amusement. (Geoffrey Biggs)

After leaving RLS he forged a career as a concert harpsichordist, having been 'taken up' by the renowned harpsichord maker Thomas Goff. After some success on the South Bank, Tony began composing and had a jazz mass performed by Johnny Dankworth. After that, he decided to try and break into pop music and spent a fortune on self promotion and the production of his own songs on record. The last I heard, and this is going back at least twenty years, was that Tony had to leave for Spain rather hurriedly to escape his creditors, and was last seen playing jazz piano in a nightclub somewhere. (Stephen Ellis Jones)

M. G. BULL (1960-1987)
Subjects: Latin, Russian
Nickname 'Johnny'

 

I was taught Latin by Mike Bull to whom I must apologise for being so useless at the language. He should be made aware, however, that what he taught me really helped in the study of other languages later. (Robin Hackshall)

 

Tovarisch John Storey mentioned a Mr. Bull taking him for Russian. Yes, this would be the M.R. Bull already included in the database. He switched to teaching Latin, as the demand for Russian dropped off. I knew him at University, and he would have joined RLS in Autumn 1960, I believe. He retired about 2 years ago, having spent his career at RLS (! ). However there are remarkably few anecdotes about Mike it seems. (Terry Turner)

... he was a dapper short man who taught us Latin. So punctual was he that we frequently groaned as he entered the class room just as the bell rang. I had always thought of him as having a total sense of humour by-pass until one afternoon, Barry O'Connor knocked on the door having escaped from a nearby Spanish class. He announced that the headmaster needed to see Mount (Chris, who sadly died in his late 20's). This was a not over used but nevertheless fairly well known ploy so that the two of them could nip off to the bogs for a fag. Johnny made no comment until Chris had been gone a couple of minutes. He then announced to the class that Jake had left school that afternoon to attend a meeting off site. He employed superb comic timing when he confronted Chris with this news on his return, having let him dig a deep hole for himself. Chris had even re-entered the class with a slight limp, gentling rubbing his backside as if he had been caned. He took the inevitable detention in good spirit.(Andy Ellis)

Aha !  Someone else who remembers "Johnny" Bull and those ridiculous built-up shoes he used to wear.  Does anyone by chance remember the old ditty which went around at the time?   Sung to the tune of "Land of Hope and Glory" it went something like:-

"Johnny Bull's had a haircut,"

"Johnny's had it all off,"

"He's getting tougher and tougher,"

"Gives you twenty-five lines.  (John Bailey)

 

"Johnny Bull's had a haircut, Johnny's had it all off, he's getting tougher and tougher, gives you 25 lines..." Fantastic mate, A song we invented about Johnny Bull our English teacher, sung to the tune of Land of Hope and Glory. It was a tribute to his God-awful haircut, which also afflicted many other masters in the "tuppenny-all-off" days, plus his weakness in dishing out punishments. 25 Lines was about 175 less than most masters, and the bloody pr..f..cts did in those days. Ah the memory. Johnny Bulls haircut. (Steve Byrne)

M. J. CHUMBLEY (1960-1962)

Subject: Mathematics

Nickname – 'Bumley Chumley'

Chumbley (not Cholmondley) started in 1960 and left in 1961 (he was 12th Romford Scoutmaster, briefly)

Chummy Cholmondeley... obviously resigned, sick at heart after his dastardly and unwelcome advances had been spurned by the lovely Ellen, whose outlook on life had been bleakened by the departure to pastures new, of the dashing and gallant sixth-former, and who could no longer look upon the daily drudge in the room at the top of the spiral staircase with any enthusiasm or anticipation. (DGM)

Re Challis (Ellen) - she, Charlotte Cubitt, Tony Sharpe, & I formed the "Lunch Club" dining (occasionally) at the Tower Arms or the Alma, latterly joined by Mick CHUMBLEY - all this came to an untimely end when said Challis and Chumbley simultaneously gave in notice - disappeared into the wide blue yonder. - any claims by DGM, I am sure are no more than flights of fancy !!! (Pete Benson - in 1999)

I arrived in Sept 1962. Challis & Chumley: I knew them both. They left during a holiday during the reign of Newth, who left in March/April 1963. This they left for the Christmas holiday in 1962 and never returned. Sad really - both very delightful people. (Bill. Broderick)

i believe mr. cholmondley {chummly} was my form master in 1A {oh look, my shift key works} in 1962{?} but i think he left the school soon after, probably following the 'scandal' i remember walking into the school office once as he quickly broke away from an 'embrace' with the secretary but i think she had short dark hair who would that be? not the divine 'she who must be adored' helen? oh my god !! sorry david.......your life has been crushed twice with one blow it must have been that not only was she seeing cholmondley behind YOUR back but that HE was two-timing HER with another member of the female secretariat !! (Graham Lee)

 

I always did think that Cholmondley was a sneaky b*****d. What can you expect from a cad whose name rhymed with "BUM-ley"! [DGM] He was 12th Romford Scoutmaster, briefly. [JS] Mr A. 'Woody' Woodhurst Maths; (1961 - 1966); Room: 2 I don't remember having the privilege of being taught by you but you could sure play a mean piano !!!!!! jazz........blues........boogie with plenty of woogie [GAL]

---

 W. GROVES (Autumn 1960)

Subject: Chemistry

Nicknames – 'Bill'

 

I also taught at the school, straight after I had left. For 6 weeks at the start of the autumn term 1961, to cover for Oscar Mold who had a broken arm. When he was fit enough to resume, he came into school to see his timetable -  pretty bleak, no exam sets in the 5th or U6 - Oscar said to Graham; "Why I have I got all these wonderful classes?", to which Boozer replied, "Because your so bloody marvellous". (Bill Groves)

R. P. ARMES (1960-1968)
Subjects: German
Nicknames – ‘Roy’,'Hairy' 'Gurney', 'Harry', ‘Tat’

I thought he was known as "Tat" but I have no idea why. (Tim Knights)

Although my own experience of Roy Armes was not particularly edifying, I frequently found the initials ' T.M.P.' (Time, Manner, Place) etched into the margin of my German homework with a red ballpoint, there may have been a different side to him not often seen at RLS. I believe that he was quite an authority on films and left the school to take up a post as a lecturer on the cinema. Maybe his bad temper was a manifestation of his frustration, similar to Roy Franklin. If we ever get Gray Walker to subscribe to this list we may find out more. I think Gray, although being far from the model pupil (bless him) knew Roy Armes fairly well. Gray went to study at what was then called the London School of Film Technique in Beaconsfield and had contact with 'Hairy' Armes, (sorry, old schoolboy joke at the expense of German teacher. I couldn't resist it) while he was there. Maybe Bill knows something about this aspect of Roy Armes’ career? (GAL)

I knew that Roy was in to films - but he was a quiet, fairly private, colleague with a slightly wry sense of humour. I was genuinely surprised that he managed to provoke the negative reaction we have seen in this correspondence. (Bill Broderick)

Roy Armes was another who seemed to subsequently acquire a reputation for unpleasantness which was quite out of keeping with my experience of his early years at the RLS.  Fox, Pilling and Franklin (and George of course) were the more violent and feared individuals in my time - perhaps our more senior members can recall whether they too started out as perfectly decent and non-violent  pussycats and if they did, suggest what might have changed them! (Malcolm Paul)

R.B. BACKHOUSE (1961-1963)

Subject: History

Nickname –

 

The Year Book records 'R.B. Backhouse B.A.' I recall him as one of the first 'modern-style' teachers. He would abandon ere-are-the-straight-facts chalk-and-talk-from-the-front-of-the-classroom and come and sit among the pupils and talk *with* us about the appropriate topic. Refreshing. (Andy Lee)

 

We impressionable young souls were very taken with him like TEO he was a sports car fan and at that time drove a white soft top Triumph TR{?} we thought him very glamorous and bohemian as we found out that he and his wife threw convention to the winds and took separate holidays!! he was on occasion known to load his car with small enthusiasts and take them to the Essex county ground at gallows corner to watch the cricket sadly these days he would probably be accused of abduction and assault resulting, at least, in dismissal if not prosecution........... a nice bloke....... [GAL]

 

The school master anecdotes note that Backhouse drove a white soft top Triumph TR{?.  We got used to him zipping into school after lunch down the drive across the playing fields. On notable day he was closely followed by a black police Jaguar, bell ringing, all the way to the masters car park outside the Hall. Presumably he was not aware of this until he stopped!  Of course, the boys gathered around to watch him being booked for speeding in a built up area. How embarrassing for him and the police. What fun for us. (John Hawkins)

J.F. HARGREAVES (1961-2)
Subject: French
Nickname -

Hargreaves. He taught French, and crossed swords with Holmes by refusing to give up his holiday to accompany a French exchange. (Ian Lister).

HARRIS (1960s)
Subject: English
Nickname -

It was a winter day in one of the classrooms on the first floor, facing out to Upper Brentwood Road; 4S with Mr Harris for English. He read us a poem: Strange Encounter, by the 1^st WW writer, Wilfred Owen. Composed in 1917, it might have been thought to have little to relate to a group of bored fourth-formers. When he had finished, there was not a sound: whether it was the content and meter of Owen's verse, the manner in which it was read, or the resonances of the subject, I do not know, but it stopped us for a moment. We even talked about it afterwards and, on the occasion where I have encountered a former member of the class, they have also been able to recall that moment. How did it form me? Why do I think of it as a "defining moment"? Because it sent me in search of poetry as a serious means of writing about ideas otherwise too difficult to express. (Peter G. Underwood)

J.C. TARRANT (1957-62)
Subject: Mathematics
Nickname: 'Spider', 'Johnny'

I was in 1B ("Spider" Tarrant was the form master) and we met, I think, in Room 12 on the top floor. (Peter G. Underwood)

"Spider" Tarrant, a member of staff I haven't heard referred to much on the site. I regarded him as one of the better teachers during my time (he certainly got me and a number of other non-mathematical types through our "O" Level in that subject!). However, I never remembered him being referred to as "Spider" where did that come from? (Bob Tucker)

The nickname 'Spider' surely comes from Tarrant (tarantula)? (Robert Priddy)

There was a story about Tarrant in his early days that, when attempting to discipline one of the younger pupils, he was informed, "We've been told only to take notice of older boys who wear a silver badge." (J. Alan Smith)

I completely agree with Derek Humphrey's comment about Mr. Tarrant and his tendency to reach a high pitch when excited and recall that his usual exclamation at such times was "Right now you people!", with the final word pronounced more as if it were spelt "peepurl".
I still think he was one of the best! Does anyone know when he left the school? (Bob Tucker)

Mr. Tarrant... achieved the magnificent feat of getting me, and sundry other non-mathematical types, through Maths "O" Level. A thoroughly decent bloke too. (Bob Tucker)

He was my form master when I was in 1C (room 12) in 57/58. I believe it was his first year at RLS too. He was OK apart from the time that, despite everything we'd been told to the contrary about streaming at RLS, i.e. that 1C was just as good as 1A, he said that we were all a load of non-achievers (to be fair, I don't think he used that expression, but then who did in 1958?) and that's why we were in 1C in the first place. I must say that it knocked my confidence for about five minutes. Then I went and bought six penny buns at break time and got on with my life. Now, more importantly, who remembers those penny buns? They'd cost you about six bob each now. But that's inflation for you. (Derek Humphrey)

I remember Mr Tarrant (can't think of his first name, though we knew him as "Spider") as form master in my first year at RLS.  He quickly earned the respect of the form and we were somewhat in awe of him, especially when he was annoyed: his face would become suffused with a pink flush, the shade being indicative of his level of annoyance.  He was certainly an excellent maths teacher, able to make the sometimes arcane aspects of the subject interesting by relating it to our everyday lives.  No doubt anyone who was taught by him will have vivid memories of estimating the height of trees in the school grounds as an introduction to trig. (Peter G. Underwood)

Mr. Tarrant, or "Spider" as we preferred to call him certainly didn't terrify me! Nor, sadly, was he, in my humble opinion at least, any great shakes at
teaching maths - although it's probably a mite unfair to lay at his door the TOTAL responsibility for my inability to subtract 1 from 4 and arrive at
anything like an approximation of the correct answer. "Spider" once attempted to ingratiate himself with our class by telling us of the three red Indian women who all gave birth to sons while reclining on animal skins, the one who was on a hippopotamus skin excelling by producing twins. This, he insisted, proved that the sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus was equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides. We didn't think it was very funny either! [DGM](D.G. Maltby)

A. WOODHURST (1961-1966)
Subject: Mathematics
Nickname: 'Woody'

Mr A. 'Woody' Woodhurst Maths; (1961 - 1966); Room: 2last updated: 01/06/2000; Score: 166i don't remember having the privilege of being taught by you but you could sure play a mean piano !!!!!! jazz........blues........boogie with plenty of woogie [GAL]

It was definitely Woodhurst. If you look in the Rogues Gallery you will see his picture. That is definitely the Mong whose life we made one of a dog.  Aren't schoolboys cruel? (John 'Mac' McCarthy)

The original inspiration of this particular thread was when John McCarthy asked "who was the maths teacher we called 'Mong'? "    I said that I though this had to be Alan Woodhurst, since that was what my year called him.
Hon. members Chris Fribbins, Tony Guest and Steve Hyde are adamant that it was in fact Willimott who bore this nickname.  Before we get too carried away, chaps, could I just point out that Hon. member McCarthy left RLS in 1966 - which was before Willimott, "Geno" Washington  et. al. joined the school.  So I must maintain my contention that it was Woodhurst who first had that nickname - and if you had seen him close up it would be quite clear why a lot of cruel teenagers (i.e. ourselves) would saddle him with it. Come on you boys, pay attention at the back ! (John Bailey)

...joined the Electronics Society (or similar name). Alan Woodhurst was the master involved in its supervision. He was very enthusiastic and supportive and we were able to make use of such wonders as the AVO multimeter and thesignal generator to test out our attempts at innovative circuitry. I builta very primitive "hard-wired" computer (that is, the logic gates consistedof combinations of physical switches) that lit up a few lights as the rewardfor one's computations. The feeble glow was all the recompense one neededfor quite hard work! (Peter. G. Underwood)

I. LISTER (1961-1962)
Subjects: English, R.E. (German?)
Nickname -

Our list of Masters omits a tall, youngish fair-haired English teacher, Mister Lister, who was noted for his laid-back style. (John Hawkins)

I remember Mr Lister for two things: First, he accompanied the German exchange group to Leverkusen in 1962 or 1963 (?), and then left the group to visit Switzerland for a few days. My father was not very impressed when I (innocently) told him of this. It seemed fairly reasonable to me at the time.
Second, when he left, he made a leaving speech that included a comment that "... I have often felt closer to some of you (the pupils) than I have to some of my colleagues sitting behind me now ...". This seemed a strange thing for a teacher to say, as at the time teachers were teachers and pupils were pupils (weren't they?). Later, as I grew in age, reaching even his advanced years (probably mid to late 20s), I began to understand what he meant. (Mick Potter)

A. EVANS (1964-1970)
Subject: French

Nickname: 'Andy'

 

R. C. HILL (between 1962-1972)
Subject: English
Nickname: 'Reg'

Reg Hill was at the RLS for some of the time I spent there (62 - 72). He taught English. I seem to recall a tallish thin fellow with a soft educated northern accent - a slightly wry sense of humour and great skill with language. Stan told me yesterday, en passant, that when he left education and took up writing he wrote the (Sp?) Pascoe & Dalziel books which have since appeared on the box. He is now enjoying retirement in Cumbria, we think. (Bill Broderick)

I was also in Reg Hill's class on his and my first day in January 62. Last lesson in the afternoon, in walked George, eminence noire, solemnly shook hands with this gentle, tall man - his knees seemed to bump against the desk as he stood up - and walked out again. Reg Hill kept teaching till 1980, according to his website, and I'm sure children were all the better for it. In a tough atmosphere, it was his kindness that really shone out, and I've been puzzling over how a person with this nature could come up with a character like Dalziel, let alone invent some of the violent scenes in the noverls. Paradox. (John Bald)

I was most interested to read of the career of Reg Hill -- it was, indeed, he of whom I wrote in my "Defining moments" e-mail, earlier this month. Perhaps this could be added to the "database"? (Peter G. Underwood)

I wonder if he was the master who took us for a physics lesson in the absence of the regular master. It was a teacher I had at no other time. He read us a chapter from his latest manuscript, and told us that he published under a pen-name. It was of a Marie Celeste type of story, a sailing ship found at sea completely abandoned. I had the impression that he had already published a few works. I am trying desperately to recall his appearance and other info.(John Hawkins)

It was a winter day in one of the classrooms on the first floor, facing out to Upper Brentwood Road; 4S with Mr Hill for English. He read us a poem: Strange Encounter, by the first world war writer, Wilfred Owen. Composed in 1917, it might have been thought to have little to relate to a group of bored fourth-formers. When he had finished, there was not a sound: whether it was the content and meter of Owen's verse, the manner in which it was read, or the resonances of the subject, I do not know, but it stopped us for a moment. We even talked about it afterwards and, on the occasion where I have encountered a former member of the class, they have also been able to recall that moment. How did it form me? Why do I think of it as a "defining moment"? Because it sent me in search of poetry as a serious means of writing about ideas otherwise too difficult to express. [PU]

The biographies at http://www.twbooks.co.uk/authors/rhill.html and http://www.stopyourekillingme.com/Bio/Reginald-Hill.html confirm that he was a teacher for 20 years (no mention of RLS though) and include a photograph. [AHL]

Subject: Mathematics

Nickname – ‘Fred’

I remember a certain Peter Barker handing out 100 lines to me. As I had access to the teletypes in the computer room I quickly set about creating a tape loop for one line and then ran off the printout for him. In his infinite wisdom he accepted the output and instructed me to run off another 900 thus condemning me to a lunchtime watching a teletype chattering away - poetic justice!!! [CS]

 J. A. MADDOCKS (1956-1964)
Subject: Physics (Lab. Assistant)
Nickname: 'Jack'

He was good company and used to brew tea in his room using lab. equipment. [JAS]

I remember the Physics Lab Assistant (of the dates suggested) who used to be able to clean the chalk board to a solid black without a trace of a smear whereas everybody else managed to make it look grey. I asked him many times how he did this but he said it was a trade secret. He told me how it was done on my last day at school. [DES]

… the only member of staff referred to by first name that I can recall [JH]

The old physics lab assistant Jack Maddocks was a lovely bloke, who must have worked well past retirement age. On his retirement some boys clubbed together to give him a book on the silent movie era, a time on which he often reminisced. Jack was the only member of staff referred to by first name that I can recall at this time! He seemed to enjoy working with the boys, unlike most of the RLS staff! He still mooned over his youth idol Mary Pickford. (John Hawkins)

The old physics lab assistant Jack Maddocks was a lovely bloke, who must have worked well past retirement age. On his retirement some boys clubbed together to give him a book on the silent movie era, a time on which he often reminisced. I can't recall boys clubbing together for a retirement gift for any other member of staff. (John Hawkins)

In the fifties, when members of staff left, an official collection was taken round classes. This doesn't quite cover boys clubbing together but it may explain why it didn't happen more frequently. (Alan)

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Could this be the same history teacher of whom I have enquired previously? My recollection is of a lesson in ancient middle-eastern script - "This wraaatin's called Keeeeuuuunieform wraaatin'." (Andy Lee)

Robert suggested that this might be "Mr A. Springall (before 1963 - after 1963)" Yes! Mr. Springall it was! (Andy Lee)

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If he is the History teacher from late sixties and early seventies, I think he was known as "Harry" but I don't know why. (Tim Knights)

Roger wrote: "Interesting to hear that Micky Sanders was so academically gifted. He taught me 'A' level history and was by far the best teacher I had at school."
That's TWO votes for him as "Teacher of the Year" now! Academically gifted? Probably/possibly not. I could think of two or three (or four) others in his year who might outshine him (No, I was not one of them!) But a VERY conscientious and hard worker. Everything he did had the same perseverance, attention to detail, organisation and sheer hard graft. Also while we came to school proudly humping our shiny new leather satchels, Mick was the only boy in the intake who sported an efficient-looking briefcase! He was just one of those guys who had "Success story - pr*f*ct material" written all over him!

TURNER (1960s-19??)
Subject: Physics
Nickname -

 

Turner once tested a vehicle coil in the Physics lab. Somehow he gave himself a high voltage electric shock, for he let out a shout and flew backwards through the air, sending a number of lab. stools flying, to land safely on the floor. This seemed to happen in slow motion as we all looked on. (John Hawkins)

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Mr Baxter made maths interesting, I now have a lifetime fascination with the subject which led to my acquiring certain computer skills which helped my career no end. (Chris Broadbridge)

1965 Maths in our 1st year. He had deadly accuracy with pieces of chalk thrown at boys thought to be chatting or dozing. I recall one quote from him. He asked someone in the class a question, along the lines of, "What is the square root of 16?" The reply was, "Please sir, I think it's 4." "You think it's 4?" he exclaimed, "This is a Grammar school, you don't come here to think, you come here to know." (Tim Knights)

the lovely Phillipa. Phillipa Dines was 22 when I was 16. Blond hair down to her waist, short skirt, long legs, blue eyes and I loved her. Mind you, so did every other boy in the school. I don`t know what good old Mr.Coles was thinking when he employed these visions, amongst hundreds of boys with raging hormones (and raging acne, in some cases) Phillipa, where are you now? (Tony Harrison)

Mention of Mrs Dines the chemistry assistant set the memory going. As a 13/14 year old the sight of her in a short lab coat with an even shorter miniskirt underneath was enough to... well enough! Years later I was playing volleyball for Brentwood and discovered at the post match visit to the pub that the Philippa Dines in the team was none other than that same chemistry assistant. Still great legs! I believe she now lectures at Havering College just up the road from my current abode. (Steven Byrne)

We followed Phillipa Dines - and not only in the labs. (Vince Leatt)

Peter Robinson wrote: "Mrs M Keslake it tells me - Marion, I think. Laboratory assistant to Jet Morgan. Commenced 1964/5?, and I think was still there when I departed '68."
Or as Jet used to pronounce it: Mrs Kayyyzlake. she must have left before1970 because we had a different assistant when I was failing A-level chemistry. Was it Mrs Dines? Not sure. ( Steve East)

Phillipa Dines did follow Marion Keslake - but only in the Labs. (Bill Broderick)

It was indeed the lovely Phillippa Dines - known as "conk" by some of our 6th form Chemistry set, I believe. (John Bailey)

You were not the only ones to follow hopefully! Rumour had it that one ofthe year below mine had actually succeeded in working his way into the lovely Phillipa's affections. As Phillipa's brother-in-law was a member of that year this may be even more of a shaggy dog story than usual, or it might equally have some grain of truth. Unfortunately none of that year are members ( or at least I haven't seen anyone signing themselves as 1964-71, Mr. Moderator) so it will have to remain merely a rumour. (John Bailey)

...the sexy blonde that used to wear white coats around the labs, and a very small bikini in the pool on Saturdays could surely only have been Phillippa Dines, if she had a somewhat Roman nose as well as her other charms. (John Bailey)

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He was certainly my English teacher in 6B, so 1960/61, but I think he left at the end of the year. Wasn't at the school long so perhaps arrived 1958 or 59. Very intellectual - encouraged us to read Lady Chatterley, The Duchess of Malfi and 'Tis pity she's a whore!!! Seen skipping along the drive on his way home once - which was rather strange as he detested all things physical and athletic! [DGM]

Mr. Wilkes I rather think must have left in 1965 or 1966. He had certainly gone before I finished in 1967, and it was quite a shock to come across him striding through the streets of Durham one day while I was at University there, as I had no idea that was where he had gone. (Geoffrey Biggs)

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Room 19/20 … Ken Lovatt...........biology master who had three nipples.....honest!!.....he showed us. I think it was something to do with genetic throwbacks another good bloke..........part of the newer generation d.m. {'dim jim'}(Graham Alexander Lee)

I think Keith Lovatt arrived at the same time as me in Sept 1962. (Bill Broderick)

When thinking of slippers who remembers Ken Lovatt's slippers? These had a name chalked in reverse upon the sole so that when hit ones backside retained the slippers name. I cannot remember now whether the slipper had a name of its own or the name of the miscreant was used, Can any HMs help? (Robin Hackshall)

Ken Lovatt was our form teacher for 1st year, and I distinctly remember a sadistic streak in him which disturbed my first year. (Ian Macauley)

...the biology teacher Kenny Lovatt (spelling?) had a slipper called Rupert, that was always chalked with the name of the last victim, written in mirror writing so that the name appeared on the newest victim's rear end. (Pete Isaac)

I think you will find that it was Keith Lovatt and that he taught Biology. He is fondly featured in the archives as 'the man with three nipples'. (It was true. I remember the lesson vividly.) (GAL)

Was Keith Lovatt the geologist who replaced John Reekie when he retired in 1962 or thereabouts?. I remember visiting the RLS party in Austwick when both of them were there. Although I had left when he was appointed, Keith always seemed a very pleasant man, and a very good geologist. (Bill Groves)

Biology tutoring from the erstwhile Ken Lovett. Now back in '66 they were very keen on getting the nitty-gritty out of the way early doors (as big Ron would say), so the first thing that we little kiddies were exposed to was the chicken in the egg (several members vomiting), then the dissection of the pregnant mouse (more members vomiting), and then the display at the front of the class of the male and female reproductive organs of homo sapiens. (ash howe)

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.... he was an all round good egg. (Marcel Humphrey)

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